Minnesota Collaborative Divorce, Minnesota Divorce

Tagged Amicable Divorce, Collaborative Divorce, Minnesota, MN

Amicable Divorces in Minnesota: Why They Always Trump Greed and Revenge

by Joseph M. Flanders January 19, 2015 462

If you are thinking about a divorce, please think about a Minnesota collaborative divorce.

Many divorcing couples believe their marriages have become emotional quicksand. However, few are as vile as the one depicted in Edward Albee’s 1966 film classic “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf,” starring Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.

That film showcases a depth of dysfunction unfolding during an evening spent with friends that could frighten almost any engaged couple into thinking twice about “tying the knot.”

Fortunately, once divorce appears eminent, most husbands and wives are eager to put the process behind them as quickly as possible.  If you count yourself among them, you’re definitely ahead of the game.

Yet there will always be some who will do all that they can to generate additional heartaches for their spouse – right up until the time the final divorce decree is issued.

When you meet with your Minnesota family law attorney, you’ll be urged to interact as positively as possible with your spouse. Should you ever doubt the wisdom of this approach, be sure to review the following information — it will clearly remind you of how much everyone has to lose if one or both parties refuse to act as cordially as possible.

Important Reasons for Divorcing in a Friendly Manner

• Your future happiness depends upon it. Far too many angry ex-spouses use their money, children or other mutual assets/relationships to keep harassing one another as long as they can. Remember, when you mistreat each other, you’ll have a large audience of family members, friends, employers and others observing how you conduct yourself;
• Your children’s future mental health is at stake. As many studies have documented, behaving in a sensitive manner is critical since “children who experience parental divorce are at an increased risk for a wide range of mental health, substance use and social adjustment problems.” By completing the process in a quick and respectful manner, you may be able to at least minimize the negative consequences of your divorce. If you truly want your kids to have a fair chance at a happy marriage one day, at least show them that divorcing couples can still treat one another with decency and respect;
• Lengthy divorces are both unnecessary and wasteful financially. Dragging out divorce proceedings not only wears everyone out emotionally, it can wind up costing a couple a significant portion of their savings. Constantly filing unnecessary motions to change custody and financial arrangements are simply self-defeating;
• You’re usually much more likely to receive a fair financial settlement if you remain cordial. A fair distribution of all marital assets, including funds set aside for retirement, can sometimes depend on how pleasantly the spouses are treating each other. Angry spouses are far more likely to try and hide large assets from one another – even though such behavior is completely against the law;
• Greed rarely pays – and it often generates widespread, public condemnation. The news headlines often feature ex-spouses who just won’t let go of the financial side of divorce. One recent case involves the ex-wife ofOklahoma oil magnate Harold Hamm. Now that the ex-Mrs. Hamm has finally decided to cash a divorce settlement check worth $975 million – she’s decided to press for even more money. While late-night comedians may joke about such behavior, the true losers in such divorces are innocent children and other relatives – as well as those who appear to thrive on the adrenaline rush of never, ever letting go of the situation and moving on with life.

After thoroughly discussing the facts of your case with your Minnesota divorce attorney, you may want to read more at this link about all of the important matters that must be addressed while pursuing an amicable divorce.

For more information on divorce in Minnesota, along with a variety of other topics, contact Joseph M. Flanders of Flanders Law Firm at 612-424-0398.