Getting a divorce is a life altering event. The decision to end a marriage is never an easy one – especially when children are involved. The long-term effects on children of divorce parents can be severe.
When the decision to end a marriage happens, it is certainly easier if their are no children. There are many reasons why divorces happen, but you should think twice about whether a divorce is best for your children.
Studies have shown that children of divorced parents often have greater academic difficulties. Divorces also have a big effect on a child’s self-esteem. Although the two parents may get along after divorce, they need to be cognizant of the long-term effects on the children.
In many states, a collaborative or “family-centered” divorce process is followed in the legal system. Many jurisdictions have set up “family court” which have different judges, magistrates, and other family law facilitators which are different from the regular courts. As a practicing lawyer at a family law law firm, I know that these courts are often very good at dealing exclusively with family based problems.
In a family court, the judge or other court appointed staff are often better equiped to deal with the problems created by divorcing or seperating parents. The courts know the common arguments and problems that arise in many marriages. Perhaps one of the best things about specific “family courts” is that they are very cognizant of the effects of divorce on children.
For example, a family court judge will have heard many of the same argument by divorcing parents and their attorenys. They are aware of many of the things that cause people to seperate – including infidelity, money, and other reasons. Divorcing parents often have legitimate reasons why they cannot be with their spouse any longer. However, the judges know that the children’s interests are typically not served by parents divorcing. Therefore, when making a family law decision, the courts will always use the “best interest of the child standard.”
The best interest of the child standard takes into account clearly-enumerated factors which dictate how the judge must decide when making a family law decision. I will lay out some of the common “best interest” factors in a later post. However, for this post, it is simply important for parents to realize that when divorcing, the judge will not be as concerned with the parent’s arguments but, instead, will be thinking only about the best interest of the child.
Speaking with an attorney at a family law law firm would be a great place to start on how to act or what to do to protect the best interest of your children. Lawyers are not social workers or psychiatrists, but they may be able to give you more insight into whether filing for a divorce is right for you and your family. Perhaps you may even make a decision not to divorce.
This post was written by Joseph M. Flanders, a Apple Valley MN lawyer.
This is very interesting Joseph and I do agree that getting a divorce is also a massive decision to take and especially if there are young children involved where it can have a dramatic impact on their lives. A good law firm will definitely make the whole process much smoother.